"Smegma Wad of the Week"
I'm afraid the term "Douche-Bag of the Week" has become assed-out. While doing a "Google" search on it, I discovered 1,110,000 different posts for it. It seems every shock-schlock-jock radio guy or columnist uses this tool as a weekly feature. I still think it's a viable idea, so let's change the name. I came up with "Smegma of the Week".
I was surprised to find how many people I tried this out on, weren't sure just what smegma was. Smegma is a combination of secretions of the sebaceous gland, sweat and dead skin cells, which collect (in men) just behind the glans of the penis, and (in women) around the clitoris and folds of the labia. In common parlance "Dick Cheese" for the fellas and "Clitty Litter" for the gals.
Yes, yes, I know...is this accurate for the purpose I'm using it? After all smegma is actually useful in a biological sense, and my weekly picks certainly serve no gain to mankind whatsoever. True. But just imagine a pile of smegma the size and weight of a grown human. Unpleasant?
I thought so.